I bet you thought that because I was on holiday you were safe from blogs for a bit. Far from it…my mind just finds other things to think about. Cuba is lovely and time in the heat reminds me of the value of rest!
Every so often Fran and I get told that we are inspirational. This is something I struggle with a bit. Fran is inspiring..a five time world champion..I get that..but for me I am less sure! I think that everyone is in their own way, it’s just that some ways are more prominent than others.
So the chap that called us inspirational was a great guy. He, his wife and daughter all worked in various ways within the learning disability sector in Canada. So it wasn’t a kind of patronising ‘inspirational’ which was good. This kind of inspirational, well meant as it is, is difficult. You smile and gently challenge, pointing out that we live independently and that is usually enough to make people think.
So why then is being called inspirational a paradox? For me it is because it shows how much work there is to be done whilst at the same time showing a version of what is possible.
The basis on which Fran and I are called inspirational is essentially down to the fact that we get on with life in that we:
-Both work: We’re frequently told by professionals and others that we are the only disabled people they see or know who have jobs.
-Own our own accessible house: This is probably more down to the shortage of accessible housing than anything else!
-Go on holidays by ourselves: Through careful research it is possible to find accessible places
So being called inspirational for these things, which I would argue are not particularly remarkable, makes me a bit sad. Shouldn’t everyone with an impairment be able to do these things? The fact that Fran and I are regarded as being exceptional for doing so shows the challenges disabled people can face. These challenges are arguably more profound and stark than ever before given the unprecedented social and personal political landscape we find ourselves in.
According to my mum (we’ve come on holiday with my parents as we’ve raved about our resort!) I under estimate how difficult my own life is. She gives the example of it taking 10 minutes to put my shoes on to illustrate this point! Maybe she makes a good one.
My standards are really high and that’s why being called inspirational fires me up. I want to keep making a difference so that I’m not regarded as inspirational any more. That’s the power that this slightly awkward and ill fitting label gives.
So there is the paradox: Being inspirational is sad and a call to action all at the same time. I maintain that everyone is inspirational in their own way.
The form counselling I’m training in suggests that success is doing what we can with the resources we have. I’ll raise a mojito filled glass to that!